Sunday, March 08, 2009

At heart, I have always been a coper.

And if you could change it would you? I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t change one second of the journey because if it wasn’t for that journey I wouldn’t be at the exact place that I am right now. And that thought scares me because I like where I’m at right now. If it wasn’t for the pain, I wouldn’t have the knowledge I have right now, if it wasn’t for the struggle I wouldn’t appreciate what’s to come. If it wasn’t for the risk, I would be left wondering for the rest of my life what if? So no, I don’t regret a single second of anything I’ve experienced the past year because I learned the realities of life. Sometimes things don’t work out, sometimes love isn’t strong enough, and sometimes you have no control over what happens in your life. And I think knowing that puts me ahead of the game.

"At heart, I have always been a coper, I've mostly been able to walk around with my wounds safely hidden, and I've always stored up my deep depressive episodes for the weeks off when there was time to have an abbreviated version of a complete breakdown. But in the end, I'd be able to get up and on with it, could always do what little must be done to scratch by."
--Elizabeth Wurtzel

"Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell."
--Edna St. Vincent Millay

No comments: