Sunday, August 17, 2008

You deserve a fucking phone call.

All quotes from 'He's Just Not That Into You' and 'It's Called A Break-Up Because It's Broken' by Greg Behrendt & Liz Tuccillo

"He's just not that into you if he's not asking you out. Because if he likes you, trust me, he will ask you out. So don't let him trick you into asking him out. When men want you, they do the work. I know it sounds old school, but when men like women, they ask them out."

"If men want you, they will find you. If you don't think you gave him enough time to notice you, take the time it took you to notice him and divide it by half."

"When it comes to men, deal with them as they are, not how you'd like them to be."

"An excuse is a polite rejection. Men are not afraid of 'ruining the friendship.'"

"If you can find him, then he can find you. If he wants to find you, he will."

"If he's not calling you, it's because you are not on his mind. Period."

"Men don't forget how much they like you. So put down the phone."

"You are good enough to be asked out."

"If he creates expectations for you, and then doesn't follow through on little things, he will do the same for big things. Be aware of this and realize he's okay with disappointing you. Don't be with someone who doesn't do what they say they're going to do."

"'Busy' is another word for 'asshole'. 'Asshole' is another word for the guy you're dating."

"You deserve a fucking phone call."

"Beware of the word 'friend'. It can often be used by men or the women that love them to excuse the most unfriendly behavior. Personally, when I'm picking friends, I like the ones who don't make me cry myself to sleep."

"Men, just like women, want to feel emotionally protected when a relationship starts to become serious. One way they do that is by laying claim to it. A man who's really into you is going to want you all to himself. And why wouldn't he, hot stuff?"

"Oh, how easy it is for you all to forget what it's about! Let me remind you: It's about the guy who wants you, calls you, makes you feel sexy and desired fully. He wants to see you more and more often because every time he sees you, he likes and then loves you more and more."

"Guys tell you how they feel even if you refuse to listen or believe them. 'I don't want to be in a serious relationship' truly means 'I don't want to be in a serious relationship with you.' Sorry."

"There's a guy out there who will want to tell everyone that he's your boyfriend. Quit goofing around and go find him."

"Your lost self-esteem may take longer to find than a new boyfriend, so prioritize accordingly."

"Let's call cheating what it is--a complete betrayal of trust."

"Bad boys are actually bad."

"Don't spend your time on and give your heart to any guy who makes you wonder about anything related to his feelings for you."

"Don't be flattered that he misses you. He should miss you. You're deeply missable. However, he's still the same person that broke up with you. Remember, the only reason he can miss you is because he's choosing, every day, NOT to be with you."

"Because here's what guys don't do if they can't live without you: They don't break up with you."

"It's not that he's so into you after a breakup. It's that he's so not into being alone."

"Just remember that the person you are getting back together with is the same person who, not long before, looked you in your beautiful face, took full stock of you and all your qualities, and told you that he was no longer in need of your company."

"Don't confuse classy with being a doormat."

"A guy says he doesn't want to be with you. Sometimes that guy realizes he's made the biggest mistake of his life. And then sometimes he doesn't. Either way, your only job is to move on with your life, and fast."

"Fine. Breakups, I've heard, are supposed to be just that. Breaks. Hard, clean breaks. No talking, no seeing, no touching... keep your hands to yourself. The relationship is over."

"There's a guy out there who's going to be really happy that you didn't get back together with your crappy ex-boyfriend."

"No answer is your answer."

"Unless he's all yours, he's still hers."

"There's lots of behavior that can be considered abusive that doesn't include being beaten about the head and neck. That includes getting yelled at, being publicly humiliated, or being made to feel fat and unattractive. It's hard to feel worthy of love when someone is going out of their way to make you feel worthless. Knowing that you're better than these relationships is a place to start. You are better than these relationships."

"Obviously I don't think people should go out with someone who is abusive to them. But there are subtle degrees of abuse. There are many shades of Mr. Wrong. And these guys that we're talking about? They're not just assholes. They can be nice, sometimes, too. And there are many days when I personally think it's better to be with someone who your friends might hate... than be alone. "

"You deserve to be with someone who is nice to you all the time (You have to be nice to them, too.)"

"There's never a reason to shout at someone unless they're in imminent danger."

"Make a space in your life for the glorious things you deserve."

"Even with all the mayonnaise in the world, you can't make chicken salad out of chicken shit."

"And you can't get over the heartbreak until you let yourself feel it."

"I was so desperate for him to love me, want me, to fight for me, that I was literaly grateful for any mere scrap of effort he put in."

"Because I'm telling you that from this great fall I've come a long way & I love my life now more than ever thought possible."

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