All quotes from 'Girls Poker Night' by Jill A. Davis
"Have you ever written your name, or see it printed somewhere, and thought it look unfamiliar? Like maybe you spelled it wrong or something?"
"I’m kind of happy with the way I turned out. I mean, things could be worse. I could be boring. Or unhappy. Or, like, I don’t know, Canadian or something."
"Every day the opportunity exists to change your life. But most days, the idea of having to change the big things in life just seems like too much work."
"I feel like a refrigerator has fallen on me and I’m pinned underneath it hoping to escape but in the meantime my life is sprinting ahead of me, assuming I’ll catch up."
"That’s what people do – they move into their new life and disassemble the old life in some ungrateful way and leave it out by the curb. Like it never served any purpose at all. Like self-preservation is some frivolous little thing."
"Might as well just fold right now. Get out before I get too far in. I just want you to know that it’s not lost on me. That I realize this game is a metaphor for my life. My friends are different, though. They all seem okay with losing. They even enjoy it – the risk taking. Secretly, they must not like it, though, right? I mean, how could anyone enjoy that – losing? It must make them feel like, I don’t know, great big losers."
"Nothing says 'I’m a refined young lady' quite like eating popcorn directly out of a bag."
"And I’m sad that this is the kind of person I am. I am a person who will stay in a relationship for three years because I know that this relationship will never hurt me. I will park my love here because here I will never experience great joy, but more important, I will never be devastated. The dissolving of this won’t be painful at all. It will just be a formality. A formal ending to something that barely or never existed."
"It’s all about might. It might hurt. It might not work. It might be awful. I never think it might work. It might be good. It might be fun."
"Each day is a new table on which to roll the dice. Stop complaining and start rolling, people!"
"Has he been looking at me? I wouldn’t know, since I’ve been busy not looking at him."
"It’s funny how the prospect of love is so much more interesting when you don’t actually know the person you’re fabricating a fantasy life with."
"At least your heart knows what it wants. I mean, even if you are incapable of accepting happiness. At least some part of you is working toward it."
"Meg is one of my oldest friends, and we are completely different. And every so often I think maybe there’s not much point in our being friends anymore. But then she’ll do something amazing. She’ll say something that proves she knows me, really knows me. And I’m so grateful for that. It feels so good to be known, and I wonder if she ever wonders what the point of being friends with me is."
"We’re learning that the self we show to the world can be very different from the self we show to ourselves."
"And then I dreamed about you, and I thought that was really great, you showing up in my dreams like that. Unexpected, you know. So thanks for doing that. For showing up."
"He’s one of those guys, you know, who women go nuts for. It’s like his mother ignored him and now he has to make all women love him or something."
"We didn’t meet for coffee to talk about movies or to be together. We were having coffee so I could be told, without actually being told, that this is how it would be. We would never mention the kiss. We will pretend it never happened. Instead, we will talk about movies and condiments and all sorts of other things that don’t matter at all."
"I can’t speak. I am physically unable. I can’t fight. I can’t defend or explain myself. I thought these were my friends. I thought I didn’t have to work at keeping these people as friends. I thought they’d always be my friends. But nothing is ever straightforward. And there’s no such thing as forever. No matter how well you kid yourself. The truth is, you don’t know anyone."
"I’ve always avoided fights. I make jokes instead. I tell people what they want to hear in order to avoid a confrontation. I pretend to want things I don’t want, and I pretend not to want things I do want. No one gets hurt. Except me. The lines are so crossed and blurred at this point that I don’t know what I want. I just know I want it to be easy."
"I’m holding him up to a standard that no one can actually live up to."
"I’ve never picked anyone up. I don’t know how to pick up guys. I usually just camouflage myself as this wonderful person and let them come to me. It’s easier that way."
"But what I see is that everyone keeps changing, evolving, except for me. I lack courage. Not the kind of courage it takes to rescue a person from a burning building. Not adrenaline courage. But everyday courage, the kind that, once it’s added up, day after day, equals a happy life."
"I know exactly what I don’t want but very little about what I do want."
"'This is when your supposed to read the tabloids,' I said. 'This is when you get to read those tiny horoscope books. Or the miniature catbooks. Or look in the cart of the guy behind us and judge him on his purchases. Let's make him feel really good about the paper towels he's about to buy, and really bad about the make-your-own-taco kit.'"
"Imagine settling for a life you can have because you don't have the courage to go after the life you really want."
"I don’t have a clue where we’re going. But I keep walking anyway."